“In the same way Californians rhapsodize about In-N-Out Burger and Floridians rave about the simple joys of a Publix sub, I, a Massachusetts native, evangelize about the superiority of Polar seltzer,” wrote comedian Josh Gondelman last week. “Which is to say, my enthusiasm borders on fanaticism, and my conviction crosses the line into smugness.”

We’re in Massachusetts, too, so we had to explore this more deeply after Gondelman, a New Yorker who grew up in Stoneham, Mass. and delivered this ode to his favorite hometown seltzer brand in an essay in Slate. So we spoke with the former Desus & Mero and Last Week Tonight staff writer to get a creative consumer’s insight into why the 141-year-old brand resonates so deeply with New Englanders: 

You mentioned in your piece that Polar has a “patchy” distribution network. They did sign a national distribution deal with Keurig Dr Pepper back in 2020, but from your end it sounds like it's still a bit difficult to find outside of New England, at least in New York. What is your experience of an average Polar hunt in the city? How hard is it really?

It's less of a hunt and more like I have to clock the places where I can get the good flavors, because they do have it at a lot of places in New York. But I think by the time that they were distributing nationally, New York [already] had Hal’s, some places have Waterloo or Bubly or LaCroix as their predominant seltzers. 

But it's a very funny kind of treasure hunt. I’ll see that a place has a couple of cases of Polar upfront and I wonder if I look in the cooler if I'm going to see liter bottles of some more obscure flavors. It’s nice to have that wider distribution, but in my neighborhood I do have to think when I'm out and about “Here's where I found this one, here's where I can occasionally get a seasonal if they get them, and then here's where I reliably go for the staples.”

Do you keep notes?

No, it's not that thorough. But I will definitely come home and say to my wife, “Okay, they have that Cherry Vanilla that I like at the supermarket, but at the bodega we can get a 12-pack of cans of this” and I'm sure she's like “That's very nice for you.”

Gun to your head, you have to choose just one: Polar or Dunkin’?

That's so tough, oh geez. Okay, I know this will require an explanation, I think I would go Dunkin’. 

I think Polar does a more exemplary job of what it does: the breadth of flavors, the clarity and strength of flavor and the carbonation level are all, to me, top notch seltzer features. 

I don't know if Dunkin’ necessarily has an S-tier quality coffee, and I think their baked goods certainly are a step behind the iced coffee, which is my preferred product. However, Dunkin’ does serve a more pragmatic function in my life.

You can enjoy the full interview on BevNET.

Canned water maker Liquid Death has reportedly hired Goldman Sachs to lead a potential IPO, which could come as soon as spring 2024, The Information reported yesterday. 

• According to The Information, the hiring of Goldman Sachs resulted from an IPO “bake-off,” in which banks “vie for IPO business by pitching companies on how they would sell their stock to Wall Street investors.”
• Liquid Death has been talking about the possibility of going public since October, when it announced a $700 million valuation alongside a $70 million Series D funding round.
• In a Medium post, board member Peter Pham said the company was on pace to double its projected 2022 revenue of over $130 million in 2023.
• As of last fall Liquid Death had 94% national distribution coverage via DSD and broadline with the ability to service 346,000 doors, according to an internal deck. In October, Pham wrote that the brand was in 60,000 accounts nationwide at the time – suggesting plenty of runway ahead.
• Liquid Death must have a lot of confidence in its business to be thinking about going public. After what felt like a whirlwind of CPG IPOs in 2021, including Oatly, Vita Coco and Zevia – not to mention the SPAC fad – the drive for brands to go public has slowed significantly over the past year as the market has cooled and some companies have struggled to maintain their out-the-gate stock value. However, there’s been some exceptions still jumping into the fray in recent months. 

PARCH combines organic Blue Weber agave, cactus fruit, desert botanicals to create unique flavor pairings inspired by their motto “if it grows together, it goes together”. PARCH’s blend of functional adaptogens is designed to center your mind and body for a modern social drinking experience. Learn more

Monster’s $362 million acquisition of Bang is a “go” after a federal judge in Florida approved the sale of the brand’s struggling parent company Vital Pharmaceuticals (VPX) yesterday.

• Earlier this month the Federal Trade Commission ended its review of the proposed acquisition. VPX had previously cited concerns that the company was at risk of liquidity should a lengthy investigation hold up the acquisition.
• Last week employees at VPX’s Weston, Florida headquarters received a 60-day notice of mass layoffs. No recall, transfer or bumping rights exist. The layoffs did not extend to the company’s Phoenix, Arizona production facility, which Monster will acquire in the deal.
• The order for the acquisition is in, but the jury is still out on what will happen to the Bang brand once the deal is finalized, especially if most of the team running it is set to exit in September. Coca-Cola could possibly begin distributing the brand as part of its minority ownership relationship with Monster, but there’s been no official word yet on what Monster intends to do with its new purchase.

While many startup founders view strong demand as a good problem to have, Bossa Nova founder and CEO Alton Johnson said it poses a very serious threat to his company. Talking to BevNET during last month’s BevNET Live Summer 2023 event in New York, Johnson said the brand’s sales are outpacing its working capital and securing investment in the current financial landscape has proved immensely difficult.

• Johnson said the functional sparkling water brand’s margins are strong and pull through at certain natural channel accounts has been “crazy,” with Sprouts ordering “20 truckloads” worth of product at a time.
• However, the input costs of expansion are more than revenue can cover and the brand is too early to mount a Series A, despite some potential investors telling Johnson that they would participate in a larger funding round.
• “If our sales were going down we’d be fine,” he said.
• The company still has more than enough money to keep operating, at least for the next year, but investment will be paramount to its future, he added.

Read the full story on BevNET.

The Coca-Cola Company announced yesterday that it has enlisted eight of its bottling partners in a new $137.7 million venture fund focused on improving sustainability measures along the beverage company’s supply chain.

• The fund will be managed by Greycroft, a seed-to-growth capital firm, and will focus on five major impact areas: packaging, heating and cooling, facility decarbonization, distribution and supply chain.
• Each of the eight bottlers committed around $15 million and are spread out geographically representing about half of Coke’s global system volume.
• The fund is expected to invest in companies at the point of commercialization and “offers an opportunity to pioneer innovative solutions and help scale them quickly within the Coca-Cola system,” Coke president and CFO John Murphy said in a statement.

Everything is looking pink these days at beverage brand Swoon. The zero-sugar drink maker went all in on landing a partnership with Mattel for the upcoming Barbie movie and it seems to be working. 

• In May, Swoon launched a co-branded Barbie Pink Lemonade in anticipation of the movie’s July 21 release. In order to meet increased demand, the drink will now go into nationwide distribution through August. 
• Working with open data retail platform Crisp, Swoon said it saw a 35% increase in sales velocity at “a leading supermarket chain,” but didn’t specify which one.
• No word on whether there will be an Oppenheimer flavor, but we think it would be a missed opportunity to let Barbenheimer pass them by. That’s just our opinion though. Atomic Spiced Tea, anyone?